Wednesday, May 10, 2006

dad on the job

First of all, I have to apologize for the long blog drought. As many have guessed, I found myself overwhelmed by the new job of stay-at-home-daddying. (Not least of my worries undertaking this new position is the thorny issue of what I want to be called --- stay-at-home-dad is not it --- but I'll have to leave that question for another post.)

At left, you can see that what finally brought me back to the computer was Fern herself. She was feeling bad for having been out of touch for so long with our far-flung friends and relations, so she took matters into her own hands! So. Off we go...


The weekend before Kristin went back to work, we took Fern to the zoo. It seemed appropriate, for we've gone there several times as part of the process of becoming parents. Fern wasn't too terribly excited by any of the animals, although she did notice the flamingos, and I'm certain (though Kristin doubts it) that she smelled these penguins. I mean, look at that expression -- it's identical to the one she gives me when I come home smelling fishy from the seal hospital!

So then it was back to work for Kristin. She's working three days at her office and two half-days at home for a total of 80% time. That's allowed us a lot of transition time, which is fantastic. For her days at work, I've set up a webcam in Fern's room that she can log in to and watch; we also call and IM pretty frequently. The contact is just barely sufficient, but we feel lucky to have as much. Kristin, I'm sure, will want to weigh in on how this has all been for her, but let me describe a little of what my days are like.

Fern's become a champion at feeding from a bottle. This, I think, was one of my greatest fears: that F.E. (our new nickname for her) wouldn't be happy with milk from a bottle, or would spit up excessively, or would reject anything but the tiniest range of temperatures. Far from it: she's taking bottles regularly now, as long as they're roughly room temperature, and although she doesn't start off well sometimes, she's generally got the idea and accepted it. One huge burden off my mind.

So, on an average day, I wake up when Kristin finishes the 7-ish feed and hang out with the baby for a while. She typically doesn't stay awake much longer than the morning feed, and goes down again for an hour or so, which gives me some nice time to straighten up, make coffee, get myself going a little bit (or finish sleeping, as the case may be: I'm a bit of a night owl). Following the advice of the "Baby Whisperer," I'm roughly thinking of the day in cycles that each last from between two and four hours. My goal is to include in each cycle at least a little sleep, a feed, and some form of activity. (I hasten to point out that I'm not regimenting or scheduling these cycles in any way; it's more just a way of making sure all the needs are covered.

The choice of activity depends quite a bit on F.E.'s energy level: we might take a walk to the playground, if she's up for it, or just exercise in her boat (pictured below), or some tummy time for exercise. We've even taken to singing together: we hold concerts for Carson (the cat) to which she pays rapt attention. Add to that the challenges of timing feeds when the milk needs to be measured and warmed, changing diapers, and trying to keep the house more or less in order, and our days are nothing if not full.

I won't kid anyone that's it's not a challenge, because it is: sometimes I feel helpless and outmatched, not to mention just plain tired. But, all in all, I think I've got the good end of this bargain: I get to hang out with this incredible growing being, watching her learn and think and, really, just watching her sleep is a treat beyond words.

I've long since trampled the soul of wit with this entry, I suppose partly to make up for my long absence and also to mirror the enormity of this adventure we're embarking on. I'll sign off with this photo of Fern in her boat (a gift from Ken & Jewel), which is one of my favorites, although it's not the smilingest. This was from one of our first days at home alone, and F.E. was pretty new to the boat, too. We'd been having a conversation of sorts, and she just turned away and sat back, still thinking (you can tell by the way she's curling her hands), almost pensive. She's discovered something here: I don't know what, exactly, but the best part of being with Fern will be finding out.


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Monday, May 01, 2006

Emma and Fern meet again!

Emma & Fern (with a little bit of Ann in the background) seem to be (?) enjoying a beautiful day at Lake Merritt!

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Friday, April 28, 2006

12 weeks now!

Friday makes 12 weeks, with Fern's 3-month birthday coming up early next week. Thought I'd post a nice "waking up" series we got today: enjoy!



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Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Jacquie and Patrick visit

Graham's friend and fellow outdoor educator Jacquie & her husband Patrick came over to visit. It was so nice out that we decided to take Fern and J & P's dogs for a walk up to Alamo Square. Fittingly, they had brought Fern an organic cotton carrot hat, since "nice" in San Francisco can still mean chilly, and boy was that fog rolling in!



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Monday, April 24, 2006

waking up in a new dress

I got a few "expressive" photos of Fern waking up in a mixture of moods today. Her level of "expressiveness" continues to grow: apart from faces, she's also gurgling many different syllables and coos.

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Saturday, April 22, 2006

things are just ducky


IMG_2661
Originally uploaded by grahampc.
Fern is starting to react to "things" around her, like toys, books, and cats (well, one cat, anyway). She'll grab and pull, feel and marvel, and, inevitably, put things into her mouth. Sometimes, though, she doesn't like what she tastes!

Thursday, April 20, 2006

return to Crissy Field


Another entry by Kristin!

East is East and West is San Francisco.
—O. Henry

We finally made our way back to Crissy Field, which you may recall as the site of our endless walking the day I went into labor with Fern. It was great to go back and to remember that special day, particularly without the accompanying pain of contractions! The weather has foiled our intentions to get out more—another intended destination on our list has been the zoo. We hope to get there before my maternity leave ends (I return to work on May 8)!

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Jeanne & the girls come visit

Jeanne, Francesca, and Marisa were our first post-Easter visitors, come over to see the little one. She's still a little jet-lagged, as you can see!

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Tuesday, April 18, 2006

last Easter pictures

OK, just wanted to post a few final Easter shots...


In the car seat she borrowed from Kamryn


Speaking of whom...



In Sven, twice

Monday, April 17, 2006

Easter relations

Still catching up on the hundreds of photos from Easter: ours, Linda's, and Gary's...

This time it's all about the Minnesota branch of the family (and a few who came to town for the occasion). Unfortunately (and I'm sure she'd agree) Ali seems to always have Fern grabbed from her -- we didn't get a single picture with either her or Mark!

Once again, these are just a few highlight shots... here's the link to the whole trip.


Papa Gary


Grandma Linda


Grandma Joanie


Kristin's brother Luke & his fiancée Morgan


Easter friends!

These are highlight photos; click here if you'd prefer to see the album of the entire trip.

Fern got to meet (and see again) a lot of friends from Minnesota during our Easter holiday there. In addition to those she met at the shower, here are some more of her new (and continuing!) admirers. In this first photo, at right, Fern is meeting a fellow St. Matthew's parishioner (and the grandmother of Kristin's childhood friend Alison), also named Fern!

Fern the elder is in her 90s, which fits with what we've found: most Ferns in this world seem to be of her generation. It's possible that trend will change: we're told that a new version of Charlotte's Web is coming out soon with Dakota Fanning playing our daughter's namesake. I expect there might be a few more Ferns around soon...
Here's a few of the many people who visited Fern this week. Apologies in advance to the many visitors who are not pictured... we are still assembling our photos (and I think we missed a couple folks, too, I'm afraid!).



Rekha's mom Karin



Janice



god-grandmother Marge, with Joan



Eileen


And, just for fun, one last picture of Trevor!


Easter friends, part II

Just wanted to include this one picture of Hershbell family friend John F. from the Easter trip; it came from Gary and was so sweet I thought it needed to be included!

Sunday, April 16, 2006

an Easter album

Hey all! Sorry for the delay in getting these up; there was so much to do in Minnesota, I've not been able to post until now! Here are a few shots from the christening day. I've also posted a slide show of all the photos from this trip at this link.

First off, we unfortunately only got one photo of the fourth-generation christening gown, which my mom fixed up (and in parts, rebuilt!) just for the occasion. (It was worn by my brother, mother, grandmother, and great-aunts. I'm not sure how I got out of it!) In this photo, we're just getting ready to go. She kept the lovely gown on for the entire ceremony, but unfortunately, had an, ahem, accident immediately afterwards, so we had to switch her into a backup outfit it before we could get any photos. The backup's got a history, too: it was my mom's when she was a baby.


The baptism itself was lovely, and Fern was a doll during the ceremony; her few slight moments of fussiness were taken care of by a walk with new godmother Beth, shown here with godfather Steve. Pictured in the center is Blair, St. Matthew's new rector and the officiant today. Fern seems to like hymns -- my theory centers on the vibrations in the church, but maybe I'm being too scientific; mabye she just likes the music!

Blair gave a lovely homily, celebrated the baptism, and then Fern got to travel around the church a bit meeting everyone. Not the first time she's been the center of attention, of course, but the largest number of people!

Finally, one last cute photo of Fern at her most contented, enjoying the bustle and attention!


Saturday, April 15, 2006

a Minnesota shower

These are highlight photos; click here if you'd prefer to see the album of the entire trip.

We started our trip to Minnesota with a shower/pre-baptism party thrown by godparents-to-be Beth & Steve at which Kristin got to meet a few of the Kristin's childhood friends, including (pictured here with Beth) new godbrothers Liam & Lucas, and, of course, her god-guinea-pig.


Also at the party were childhood friends Sonia and Barry; Barry's here with five-month old Trevor, who's a little shy -- but interested!



Fern, however, is generally more interested in falling asleep, although I thought maybe I saw a glimmer in her eye. Maybe that was just the flash, though. She's pictured at right; this time Janna is holding her and Trevor's with his mom, Sonia.


Janna's boys were unfortunately not able to make the party, but at least that meant she got a lot of good Fern time!


We'll close on a picture of godgrandmother (are there such things?) Marge with Fern and Lucas.


Monday, April 10, 2006

Mary visits


IMG_2178
Originally uploaded by grahampc.
Kristin's family friend Mary was in town from Michigan for an education conference and couldn't resist trying to extract yet another smile from Fern -- and she succeeded! Together with her friend Bill, we all went out to The Metro afterward; Fern's getting to be quite a frequent diner!

Friday, April 07, 2006

having a moment in Sven

Fern's newfound interest in the world is still nascent: she really prefers sitting this way most of the time. (Personally, I think that it's because she gets bored with me; if she's sitting face-front, she can't just fall asleep whenever she wants.)

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Fern's finicky feet

Another entry by Kristin...

Fern saw her podiatrist yesterday and came home with knee-high casts on both feet and legs! It turns out that she does indeed have metatarsus adductus; the surprise was that she has it in both feet, rather than in just her right foot.

As you may recall from an earlier blog entry, metatarsus adductus is a condition in which the forefoot curves inward (if you were to examine Fern's feet, you would see that they are c-shaped). She will undergo "serial casting" treatment for roughly 3 months (which simply means that she will have new casts put on every week), after which we will receive instructions in how to massage her feet to continue encouraging them to straighten out. We really thought that this wouldn't be necessary (and to a certain extent still wonder whether it is)! The good news is that Fern doesn't seem overly bothered by the casts. From our vantage point, it's a bit dramatic, but we're starting to adjust to the sight of them without wincing.

We captured some moments on film---first the casting process itself and then Fern and her casts later in the evening on her changing table where she now regularly "talks" (i.e., coos and gurgles) to her colorful and, evidently, joy-inspiring quilt (it makes us happy too!) made by Grandma Joanie that hangs on the wall.



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